"Is he sensitive?" "Isn't everyone?"
These days, people have become very sensitive. We all have to hear
about when people are offended, and we all have to watch what we say so
as not to make others feel bad. You can barely disagree with people
without getting into a debate about feelings. You almost have to like
things infront of people so that they don't feel bad.
Twitter @nathanmacintosh
"I really liked that movie. I thought it was well written and directed."
"I really didn't like it. Just wasn't very good."
"What? But I liked it. Are you trying to say that I'm dumb because you didn't like something that I liked?"
"Umm, no. Just for me, I didn't really like it."
"But
I said I... did. By societal standards, you have to say that you liked
it in the presence of me, so that I don't feel as if I like something
that shouldn't be liked. Do you understand?"
People
have become so sensitive that a lot of times, if someone questions
something they say, they'll change their opinion. Change their thoughts
right there, just so as not to offend the other person's beliefs.
"Can I have a muffin?"
"A muffin?"
"Well, actually, you're right. A bagel."
"So a bagel?"
"Look, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to offend you. I'll have whatever morning pastry you have that you will not repeat."
"What? You want a treat?"
"I'm leaving."
There
was a point in time when you could call someone out for being wrong.
Now you're not supposed to say anything because you'll hurt someone's
feelings. So instead of disagreeing, you're supposed to pretend it
wasn't said, then talk about it later.
"You know, dolphins live in the Amazon rainforest."
"...Huh. I didn't know that. Okay, well, I have to go."
"Can you believe that complete idiot thinks dolphins live on land?"
"Look, let's just get home, okay? I can't even comprehend what was just said."
Now, for some reason, if you disagree and you call someone out publicly for what they say, you're the jerk.
"I really liked the game Twisted Metal. I loved using Sonic the Hedgehog."
"Sonic wasn't in Twisted Metal. You must be thinking of Sonic All-Stars Racing."
<GASPS>
"John, there's no reason to be rude. If he says he used Sonic in Twisted Metal, then he did."
"What? I'm not trying to be rude. You just can't use that character in that ga..."
"I... can't... I just have to... goodbye, guys. Enjoy the... rest of your.... ahhhhh!"
"See what you did, John? You made him cry. You called him a liar and made him cry!"
"Let me go talk to him."
"Why?
So you can tell him that he's not crying because of you, and he must be
thinking about something else? You've done enough!"
Another
thing that happens because of this sensitivity – celebrities will say
something, voice their opinions, sensitive people freak out and less
than TEN MINUTES later, said celebrity is apologizing. Happens time and
time again. Lead singer of Green Day freaked out on stage because he
thought he was being lit early, broke his guitar and pretty much
apologized as he was coming off because others were upset by it.
"Hey! We don't think you breaking your guitar was right!"
"...You're
right. I apologize. I'm currently still breaking my guitar, but I
apologize. I will finish destroying this thing, and my God, I'm sorry
about that."
Stevie Nicks said that she thinks Nicki Minaj
should strangle Mariah Carey. People got upset, she apologized. Who the
hell cares what Stevie Nicks says? Who cares if Nicki chokes Mariah? Why
the hell does any of this matter? It matters because people are crazy
sensitive and actual thoughts cannot be stated.
"She should be punched in the face!"
"That is offensive to me, the faceless masses!"
"Oh,
well, you're right. I take it back. Thirty seconds ago I was really
going through something. Now, though? I'm fine. Thank you, and I DEEPLY
regret my words."
It seems sometimes that
people go out of their way to be offended. People leave their houses,
trying to find something to be upset about.
"Hmmm. A poster
about cat food. Off the top, I'm not at all upset about this, but I'm
sure if I scrutinize it, I can find something. 'Feed Your Kitty
Something Pretty'. Hmmm. Nothing there. The cat is standing, staring at
me. That seems to be oka... wait! Cats don't stand, they lay down! This
gives an unrealistic view of what cats do. What if someone has never had
a cat, sees this and thinks that all they do is play all day? No! This
cannot stand! I'm upset!"
People are so sensitive now; they'll get offended on behalf of someone else, even when the thoughts are justified.
"My roommate was masturbating with his door open! That's insane! I have to kick him out."
"Kick him out? Come on, man. Isn't that a little harsh? Maybe he's going through some stuff."
"Going through some stuff? Well add 'Roommate Wanted Lists' to what he's going through. He's out!"
"I just think public masturbation is a cry for help."
"...Didn't you say yesterday that you hated this guy and that you wished he fell into a tire fire?"
"Yeah, and I do. But kicked out? That's too far."
You
can't say really anything without offending someone. Nothing. But
people still try to have opinions, while also trying to appease
everyone.
"Look, I'm just saying that show is complete trash.
No disrespect to the writers, actors, director, lighting guys,
production team or the network that plays it, but it's HORRIBLE. I mean,
I think all of these people are probably talented, but they deserve to
die. No offence, but man, just terrible. My thoughts are with their
families."
How the hell can you do that? How
can you have a negative opinion about a group but then say, "No
disrespect." When did that change anyway? There was a time when you
WANTED to disrespect.
"Hey, full disrespect here. You chew your food like a sick camel."
"Ouch.
That hurts. Didn't you mean, 'No disrespect'? That way, it's just
harmless criticism and allows me the decision to alter what I'm doing or
keep it the way that it is."
"Oh, I know that. That's why I said full disrespect. You need to know this. You chew like all of your teeth are kicking."
"...Like all of your teeth are kicking... no disrespect?"
"Full, man. Full."
Movies
come out and people get offended. What, do you want these people to run
by their projects with you before they make it? They have to ask
everyone on the planet what they think of it and if it's offensive? If
that were how things worked, nothing would EVER get made. Nothing. Ever.
Nowhere.
"Oh, see. I liked it here until he killed his wife. I just don't think that's right. I mean, why would he do that?"
"The movie's called 'He Kills His Wife'! It's a major plot point!"
"Well,
I just don't think it's needed. Couldn't he just sit her down and talk
out their problems? That's what me and Gerry would do."
"She sold him out to the mob for fifteen thousand dollars! Would Gerry ever do that to you?"
"Oh, heavens no. And if he did, I'd kill him."
People
are so sensitive they can read a tweet, be offended by it and want the
person who wrote it fired. Fired! For a 140-character thought. Get out!
"Wow!
He said he doesn't like gay people. He has no control in this world, he
doesn't run a cult, nobody is willing to die for him, he's not a
president, CEO, owner of anything, but I don't think he's allowed to say
what's on his mind. Fire this man! Light this man on fire! He deserves
all of the bad that comes his way!"
It's funny that a man's
intolerance is met with no tolerance whatsoever. We're sensitive to the
words they use, but not sensitive to the punishment that should happen
to them.
How do people think they can actually
walk around the earth and not be offended? What puts you at that level
that nothing in this world should ever rub you the wrong way?
"Sexually
suggestive rap music? How the hell did this get in front of me?! Does
this clothing store not know that I'm the Assistant Manager to the
cashiers of TD Bank? I don't need this garbage in my life! I want people
to think I'm sophisticated!"
I'm not offended by much, and
when I say that, I mean that I don't get offended by things most people
are offended by. You know what offends me? No swearing in horror movies.
People coming to a dead stop while they are walking down a busy street.
The ads in New York that tell people not to let the mayor tell them how
much pop to drink. Okay, so don't listen to the mayor. Listen to the
company that makes money when you buy more of this trash. If you want to
be 'free', bring your own container. Don't let anyone pick a size for
you!
"Will that be small, medium or large?"
"Actually,
the bed of my Ford F-150. No kid who can sweat through a wool coat is
going to tell me what to drink out of. I'll pull around back. And put my
fries in this shoe box while you're at it."
We don't deserve comment sections.
Comment sections need to be taken away from us. Time and time again
we have shown as a society that we cannot handle them. For years now, people have
been screaming at each other in comment sections. I bet the last time
there was a nice comment was during the great depression.
"I
say, I love your article on monocles and how only one eye needs to see
exquisitely while also looking exquisite. Just wanted to give you a 'hear, hear',
old chap. Hip, hip, hooray! Hip, hip, hooray! Hip, hip, hooray!"
But
later on? Comment sections just became a place for people who can't
speak, spell, or who have no human decency to be showcased.
"There be a raisin that your artical be all stupid and shit I dont tink iVe ever been angry like this eva"
Look,
it's 2012. We should be able to intelligently use all of the equipment
we have. If we want to advance this world – stop focusing on making new phones and
let's focus on getting rid of comment sections.
Ninety percent of comments are negative. Commenting on things negatively makes sense sometimes. When an article has its facts wrong or when a video is misinformed.
"Excuse
me, you said in your article that the fourth of July is this Saturday
the fifth. You see the problem here, right? Do you understand why this
is angering me? You made me comment here. You did! It's called the
FOURTH OF JULY! Are you insane?"
Rarely does
anyone just say that something is wrong with what they have read or that
they don't like it. The way people usually do it is to try to destroy
someone.
"Hey, stranger from Russia, trying to juggle oranges
for the world’s entertainment – you didn't entertain me. How does that
feel? Huh! I watched the whole thing and hated it! The whole time I
wanted to puke. Why don't you try again, loser!?"
That would actually be much nicer than the comments that people send. People want people to die in comments! Just die. There are RARELY any comments that are constructive.
"Hey,
orange-juggling-guy. I see that you are okay, but could use help. I
know a juggling teacher in your area. You should give him a call."
Nope. Most of the comments people choose to write?
"Why
don't you just die?! Yeah, die! Why don't you get AIDS and die? Trying
to entertain me with juggling? I didn't ask you to and I don't want it.
Do the world a favor and take your orange-dropping ass to hell!"
You
want people who are trying to entertain you to die if you don't find it
entertaining? That is how kings acted! Kings would sit on a throne,
bored, eating a wild boar thigh, and court jesters would dance in front
of them, while the king would decide if they live or die!
"Ugh,
pan flute again? Look, cut his head off. No, no. Cut his head off while
he's being pulled apart by horses. Wait, wait, wait. Feed his left leg
to the dragon, boil his right side, and beat his head in with his pan
flute. In the town square. Yes... yes, that pleases the king. And cut
his damn head off!"
Kings did that. And now with comment
sections, everyone acts like a king! We can all sit at home in our
computer chairs, bored, eating a Pop-Tart, deciding the fate of people.
"Ugh,
sketch video again? Look, cut your heads off! No, get hit by cars.
Wait, wait, wait. I hope a Komodo dragon comes into your house, spitting
hot acid, and burns you as he bites you to death while you are holding
your 'funny' ideas. Yeah, that pleases xboxowner2657!"
Most
of the time, it's either death or nothing. People seem to only want to
tell people when they have done something they hate. You can picture
people at home when they don't completely hate something.
"We
got a smart guy here, huh? Just BARELY entertained me, but dammit, you
did. You are lucky, bud! If I hated it, you would be dead! Virtually
dead in a terrible way!"
Comment sections also,
a lot of the time, contain people who aren't even commenting on what
they have seen or read. They are arguing with other people who have
commented. They are arguing with other people who are commenting!
Commenters arguing with commenters who are commenting! When that
happens, they are never arguing about what they have seen or read.
"What
are you – dumb? I have never wanted to see someone's entire family be
beaten to death in the street before, but you, sir. You... wow."
"Oh,
yeah? You hate me, huh? Why don't you keep sleeping with your two-ton
wife in that trailer home of yours, you middle school janitor! Tell your
kids 'Cletus' and 'SarahAnneJessicaJessieBeth' that the fries are
done!"
"Actually, bud, I live in Pittsburgh. Get your story
straight. I'm going back to watching this Prince video and I hope that
communist pinko dirtbag bastards like you leave me alone!"
"You actually like Prince? You're what's wrong with the planet."
"If you don't like him, why are you here?"
"I'm here to get hate off of my chest! That's why I'm here! You got a problem with that, un-American?!"
Also,
why do people have to act as if they are Christopher Columbus in
comment sections? People love to discover untouched comment sections
like it's land and place their "first!" there.
"Whoa! Look at
this. No one’s been here before. I'm the first! First! I'm the first one
to comment! I'm like the pilgrims. There should be a Comments-givings
Day for what I've accomplished! I'll tell the world through comments!"
Why do people do this? Did they even see the thing they're commenting on? Does it matter to them? Do they just search the internet for empty comment sections?
"Nope, that one is filled up... not this one either... BAM! I'm the first! Oh, man. What a rush. Now I can sleep."
Another
reason they should be taken away from us? People cannot control their emotions on them. Tears are shed, voices are raised, and emotions run high.
People take these so seriously and get so upset when someone disagrees
with them.
"Ya know, when my mother died I wasn't as upset as
this loser telling me that Justin Bieber isn't the lord of the world.
I... I don't even know what to say... YES HE IS! Oh, God!"
Disagreements
over meaningless things turn into screaming matches. If you disagreed
with someone in real life over nothing, it wouldn't always be a
screaming match.
"I think I'm gonna grab some Coke."
"I'm a Pepsi guy myself."
"PEPSI! HOW THE HELL CAN YOU LIKE PEPSI!? ARE YOU STUPID? IS THAT IT? YOU'RE JUST A STUPID PIECE OF TRASH?!"
"...Why are you yelling at me right now? There are kids around us, man. Calm down."
"YOU
DISAGREED WITH ME! THIS IS HOW YOU REACT WHEN THAT HAPPENS! YOU SPEAK
AT AN UNREASONABLY LOUD VOLUME WHILE CALLING THE OTHER PERSON A PIECE OF
GARBAGE!"
Wouldn't happen in real life! Comment sections, though? Every second comment is someone punching his or her keyboard.
"I
WANT YOU TO KNOW HOW ANGRY I AM SO I DECIDED TO BREAK THE CAPS LOCK OFF
OF MY COMPUTER AND TYPE AWAY! WHY AM I SO ANGRY? WHY AM I SO ANGRY!
PROBABLY BECAUSE I CAN'T TYPE ANY SMALL LETTERS! WHY DID I BREAK THE
CAPS LOCK KEY OFF? I MAY NOT BE MAD ONE DAY! WELL, I GUESS I'LL JUST
LIVE THIS ANGRY FOR THE REST OF TIME. SUCK IT, WORLD!"
People
get mad for no reason, and then, even worse, people get mad because
their insane racism cannot be contained. There are always some racists
throwing their thoughts on multiculturalism on videos. Videos about
race? Nope. Could just be a video with two kittens, playing in a box. Is
the comment section under that video safe? Two kittens that have no
affiliation to any race at all as they are not humans? Absolutely not.
"These
kittens are cute and everything, but even their soft furry heads and
tiny, cute little paw pads can't curb my anger. Black people need to go!
Get back to Africa! I bet these kittens voted for Obama! Get them out
of this country, too!"
What is the point of this? Why is it such a constant? Do higher ups at racist groups demand this?
"Jesus, Chris, I told you to type 'Koreans don't deserve to live' on that video of Dora The Explorer!"
"I'm sorry, Cyclops Jerry. I just don't see what that will do."
"Look,
just Cyclops, okay? And – my God, don't you see? What if a Korean is
reading that comment section right now? Huh?! Now they won't know that
they don't deserve to live! Do you understand now?"
"...Well... Jerry, I just think th–"
"Cyclops!
And that's it! Question Cyclops Jerry? Time to pay. Go burn fifty
crosses and say one hundred 'Jews control the media'."
"...Okay,
fine... but can I say quickly? I like being a member here and
everything, the cookouts are delicious and the uniform is quite comfortable, but I don't understand the "burning the cross" thing. I mean,
we like Jesus, right? Why burn the cross? Doesn't that only hurt us?'
"...You are on thin white ice right now, buddy. GO DO IT!"
Comment sections break down so much, that if there was a comment section attached to nothing, nothing at all, I bet it would still turn angry.
Comment sections break down so much, that if there was a comment section attached to nothing, nothing at all, I bet it would still turn angry.
"Hmm, weird. A comment not attached to anything. That's weird."
"If you think it's weird, why don't you kill yourself!"
"What? Don't you find it a little weird there's nothing here to watch or read?"
"I think you're a little weird, bud. Kill yourself!"
"Hey, both of you guys are bitches. Stop crying!"
"How did we all get here? There's nothing here!"
""How did we all get here?" What a loser bitch."
Is
there something that says you have to have dropped out of grade five to
comment on something? Did any of the people who write in comment
sections go to school? At all? Even for one day of their life? Were they
raised on a rock in a ravine? Only because I assume that if you were
raised on a rock in a ravine, there wouldn't be a lot of schooling on
punctuation.
"All right, I'm going to teach you how to snare an animal. It's gonna come in handy out here on this rock that we live on."
"Gotcha. I have to eat."
"Yes,
you do. Just as important? Forming a sentence in writing with good
punctuation. It won't help you out here beside this algae, but if you
ever have to tell someone what you think of their work online, it'll
come in handy."
"When will I ever need that skill, though? We live in the woods on this rock. I have never even seen another person!"
"I'm
not raising you on this rock in a ravine to act like a kid who was
raised on a rock in a ravine. You'll learn proper punctuation!"
"Why are we out here anyway, dad? We have a house."
"I told you, your mother and I had a disagreement about Pepsi. Now snare that squirrel!"
When
you are commenting on the internet, why doesn’t punctuation apply? Can
you not spare any? Are you saving your periods and commas for that law
dissertation you have coming up?
"Man, I'd love to use a
question mark here, but I have that big paper due this weekend and I
only have ten left. Well, I guess they'll just have to figure out for
themselves where I wanted sentences to stop and end. I honestly didn't
know I'd have that much to say about Katy Perry."
The
punctuation is horrible and so is the spelling! Comment sections are
promoting the worst spelling on the planet. People aren't even trying to
spell words correctly. Not at all.
"I told u that i d0nt th3nk that u should b famass you are dum not talantd and 2@^n hytiniw 8&&(nhyg), ya know"
There
should be a reading level requirement before you're allowed to leave a
comment. At the very least, you should have to have heard of Robert
Louis Stevenson before you're allowed to say anything about anything.
"What
is this? I go to write a comment and they ask me, 'Who wrote Treasure
Island?' I don't know that shit. I want to hate now!"
Take
these sections away from us! We clearly do not deserve them or know how
to use them whatsoever. Let's stop with the war on childhood obesity
for a minute, and focus on the war on people de-evolving to their lowest
form and screaming at others through broken English and terrible
spelling.
And after everything I've said, leave a comment below.