Nathan Macintosh

Welcome to the website for comedian Nathan Macintosh! 

You can find show dates, Videos, Blog, Instagram, Twitter, Album 'I Wasn't Talking', and Podcast 'Positive Anger' 

http://apple.co/1XJ7raY

 

For bookings contact:

Buchwald And Associates: 

New York Office

Conan Smith: (212) 867-1200

 

Be the person you're supposed to be.

There comes a time in everyone's life where you start to look around and realize that something is wrong. Is something actually wrong? Maybe, maybe not. But you WILL look around and start to question it. Are you doing what you want to be doing? Are you saying and doing the things you want to say and do? Have you made all of the wrong decisions? Who knows. But one things for sure, you will think about it. You'll start to think as well if you're being yourself. If there's something you are holding back. If you are living the way you want to live. Well, let this happen sooner than later.

Too many people wait a long time to fully start being themselves. Get to fifty, or sixty, and finally start living the way they've always wanted to live. Why not do it earlier? Because earlier, at a younger age, you are around people. "TERRIBLE", "SCARY" people, who will 'judge' you for everything you do and say. Will they actually? Hard to say. Some people WILL for sure. Others? You're probably just making it up out of fear. So, when we're younger, and in school or at jobs with people constantly around us, we put on fronts so as not to be judged. Then, when we're older, and around the least amount of people we've ever been around, we start being ourselves.
"Look at me! I'm eighty. Alone on my porch. And you know what? I ALWAYS thought the Stones were better than the Beatles. There, I said it. You hear me world! The STONES are better than the BEATLES!"

That's also the time when people start wearing what they want to wear. Not EVERYTHING calls for good clothes. You ever see someone at Wal-Mart and think what they're wearing is garbage?
"Woa. Look at that guy. Flip flops and a sleeveless 'Duck Dynasty' t-shirt. Are they crazy?"
Are you? It's Wal-Mart! It's a place where you can buy cookies AND pants. You can get your car fixed AND pick up diapers. THAT'S considered some sort of red carpet affair? No. Some of these people are criminals, sure, but most have reached a place where they don't care what you think of them. What you're wearing in a place like that shouldn't matter. In most places, really. I can't wait until people stop caring what others are wearing at award shows.
"Brad! You look so nice tonight. Who are you wearing?"
"Who I want. Blow me."
".... Well they make a nice suit."

School can be awful place for being yourself. It starts thoughts in us that we believe for way too long. Not only because people will bully you, which yes, can be terrible. More so because, people higher up don't instil enough to young people that THIS STUFF DON'T MATTER. You don't have the best jeans so people make fun of you? Don't matter! You're dating a person that some other loveless piece of garbage doesn't find attractive? Don't matter! That should be a full class in school. 'Don't Matter 101'.
"Hey, kids. Thanks for being here today. You'll notice I'm wearing just a speedo and a hockey helmet. Why? It don't matter. When a kid makes fun of wear you come from? Guess what? One day you'll BOTH be terrified about the prospect of dying. What they say don't matter. Somebody says your girlfriend or boyfriend is ugly? Guess what? One day you'll BOTH be wondering what the point of all this is. It don't matter. Your homework is to tell everyone to shove it."

What's nuts as well, is that when you start being the person you are supposed to be, you start wearing what  you want to wear, when you walk the way you want to walk, people start saying you're crazy. When you step outside of the norm, people start saying that you are crazy, that you are going insane, that you are losing your mind.
"Are you NOT wearing a snap back hat? Wow. What are you nuts? We are ALL doing it. Why would you not do this? Why would you buy a peacoat that's NOT black? Look around you? EVERYONE is wearing a black one. Straighten up!"
Saying someone is 'crazy' is a very simple way of pretending to be cool, and dismissing someone. If you say they're 'crazy', you don't have to find out anything about them, why they do what they do, or what they think. In your mind, they're crazy, so who cares? Not you. 

Most things we think are cool are made up anyway. Not in a weird negative way, but most things are fabricated to look cool, to make you look cool, or to make you feel that you should be doing whatever is going on to be cool, be considered cool, or whatever. You think what you're watching on TV has a group of cool, hip, fun people who want to be there? They are probably paid to do so! Dr. Phil's audience gets fifty bucks to sit there. I'm sure some of them want to be there anyway, but fifty bucks! Some women at clubs are paid to be there! You walk into a club, see a guy sitting there with four hot girls, and think, 'that guys awesome.' Those women are being paid! They're being paid so people like you think that place is awesome and you keep going back! You ever go into a place and think it's dead? It's probably because the manager of the club doesn't have the budget to pay the women to show up.
"Okay, we've installed your bar, DJ booth, and bathroom attendant. Now, let's talk money for these hot women that will dance here."
"Money? No, women will just show up, right? The really, really hot ones... right?"
"Stupidly hot women don't just DO anything. Where she goes, people follow. So what's her incentive to be here?"
"... Because this is the place to be?"
"Where SHE is is the place to be. When she's grocery shopping? THAT'S the place to be. Get your shit together, man."

Either way, be you. We're still having debates about whether or not someone lives in the sky. Wear the god damn hat if it makes you happy.

Twitter @nathanmacintosh
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